When I'm Listening...

When I’m Listening

When I stand in reverent wonder,

Atop mountains on an autumn day,

Though it’s not a voice like rolling thunder

Still I hear what my Redeemer has to say.

I close my eyes to better hear it,

This gentle rustling of the autumn leaves

A warm, sweet whisper joining my spirit,

A sound like the wind blowing through the trees.

Embraced in hues of gold and red

Surrounded by His grace

My heart listens carefully to what is said,

As the gentle breeze caresses my face.

Vibrant leaves catch the wind

Floating about in majestic glory

His voice tenderly blankets me like a flawless friend,

Whose love is an unending story.

His whisper tells of how He planned for me

Before words of creation were spoken

Even when time was still yet to be,

His plans would not be broken.

His promise is full of hope and love

And shines like the dew drops glistening

His voice spans the air as the wings of a dove

And speaks to me when I’m listening.

 

 

Every so often, I come across something that starts poetry swirling in my head.   A few days ago, I came across an entry on Sandy’s blog that caused such a reaction.   I tried to make a comment, but everything sounded so poetic, I decided I’d just write the poem.   Her question was, “How does God speak to you?”   And He does speak.   She also posted a video, which I have shared below.   If you enjoy reading blogs, Sandy’s is worth a visit.

The photography is from the Great Smoky Mountains (2006).

This video is amazing.    

Be sure to watch it all the way through.

Murmuration from Sophie Windsor Clive on Vimeo.

From the Bloggy Silence Comes a New Post!

I interrupt this "moment of blog silence" to post a non-inspirational blog all about me!    I went on vacation, and if you haven't checked out my pictures yet (and would like to) pop over to My Musings and see a sampling of the color we had in Gatlinburg, TN and Bryson City, NC. 

You may or may not have noticed the ticker on the left of my screen.   It's my weight loss record.   Sixteen pounds for the month of October, days which included my vacation, and my vacation included lots of eating and a chocolate fountain.   That's right...that's what I said C.H.O.C.O.L.A.T.E fountain!   I dipped a sundry of sweets into the fountain and have lusted over it ever since.   I also rediscovered breakfast pizza.

I started October 3 using Sparkpeople, which is  a great tool, but freedom does not include counting every calorie that goes into my mouth, nor dwelling on what to eat, what not to eat, when to eat....etc.!  for the last few weeks, I have walked in freedom.   I am deeply thankful to my Lord Jesus.

The Joy of The Lord

I put my trust in You

It’s You only whom I choose

Looking only to You

No one loves me like You do.

Ah, the pure goodness of our Lord!  Many are mercies of forgiveness that He bestows upon us; they are countless and unending!   His great and awesome love astounds a human mind, and the joy of His love is our strength. 

Trust Him, dwell in His strength, live in His love, and He will rain down freedoms untold.   

 

 Opryland Hotel, Nashville

His Majestic Throne

There is only one true God;

Majesty cloaks His throne.

The blood of Jesus flows from that majestic throne

to break the chains and loosen the bonds of His children.   

One day, we will all stand before that throne, 

but through our obedience, before that day, 

we can lay our chains at the feet of our savior.  

Great freedoms await us if we diligently seek His face, 

for only in His name shall the chains of bondage drop.

Opryland Hotel, Nashville, TN

The Giver of Life

Our God is so patient.

He, alone, is the giver of Life

Ask, and He will hear you.

Seek His face, and you shall see light

Knock upon the Door of Life, 

And Freedom shall be opened to you!

What are you wearing?

Your wardrobe for today?

Your Cloak of Trust

and 

Your Crown of Obedience

Go this day believing in His word, 

and in His faithfulness,

for He is our Shield of Life.

His Promises

Do you believe Him?

Then believe also His promises.

Has He not promised us a light load 

and an easy yoke?

If He promises Freedom, 

Is He not just to deliver it?

His peace is beyond our understanding.

He has heard our pleas,

And His heart is moved toward us.

We must pick up our cross and follow Him.

We are His children, 

and He never once has forsaken us.  



Gatlinburg, October, 2010



Renewing Your Mind...

Purify your mind by those things which you already know.   Study the word of God, for this is where your armor is; it is your sword of defense against the thoughts and deeds that torment you.  Fill your mind with the good word, His word, and you will see a change in your mind.

The Bible, the word of God, has lost its authority in America.

Don’t let it lose its power in your own heart.

Another first day of the rest of my life....

We can fail enough times that we start to define ourselves by failure, instead the fact that we are fearfully and wonderfully made by God Himself (Psalm 139), who breathed the breath of life into us.

According to God, I am not defined by the body I inhabit, and it is His commandment that I first love Him with all my heart, soul and mind, and then to love myself, loving my neighbor the same way. 

This prayer was sent to me by my dear friend Betty…

Gracious heavenly Father, you have said in your word that if anyone lacks wisdom, all they need to do is ask and you will give them wisdom liberally and without reproach (James 1:5). I come to you in the name of Jesus asking for wisdom to take care of myself so that I may glorify you in my body and my spirit (1 Corinthians 6:20). Give me the desire to choose foods that bring energy and vitality to my body and clarity to my mind. Give me enthusiasm to exercise so that I may strengthen my body and have the energy to do the things I need to do. Most of all, Lord, give me wisdom to put you first in my life because You have said that if I seek first your kingdom and all its righteousness, my needs will be taken care of. Thank you, Father, for giving me the gift of abundant wisdom today. Amen.

This prayer was written by Kimberly Taylor, author of the 'Take Back Your Temple' ebook.  The prayer was in response to a man who wanted a powerful prayer for him to supernaturally lose weight.   She pointed out that faith without works is dead, and that we should use the wisdom we already have to start working toward our weight loss goal.

It's a Beautiful Morning!

If you haven't checked out Sparkpeople.com, you should.   It's a fantastic resource for all things diet and healthy, and a great way to track your progress.  It's a better site than Weight Watchers...and it's FREE.

Sparkpeople.com is my tool.

Here's my thought...

With man (or Margaret) this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”

~Matthew 19:26

Neither shall the flame kindle....

Whatever is going on in your life that you’re worried about, keep your faith and trust in God; keep your little hand in His big hand and realize that Jesus said “when thou passeth through the waters, I’ll be with thee, and through the rivers,” the Bible says, “they’ll not overflow thee, when you walk in the fire, you shall not be burned, neither shall the flame kindle upon you!” For Jesus said, “I am the Lord, thy God, and I will help you in your time of trouble.” So keep your little hand in God’s big hand, and you hold on…hold on through every storm, even in your darkest night, walk by faith, not sight.

~Tony Greene
 

And He walks with me...

The one thing I know for sure is that Jesus walks with me.   He is patient and merciful as I stumble around trying to do things on my own.   Even when I struggle to treat myself right, when I want to abuse my body by even more food, He patiently waits for me to come to the end of myself, and He shows me His better way.

Psalm 146

⁵ Happy is he who has the God of Jacob for his help,
         Whose hope is in the LORD his God,
 ⁶ Who made heaven and earth,
         The sea, and all that is in them;
         Who keeps truth forever,
 ⁷ Who executes justice for the oppressed,
         Who gives food to the hungry.
         The LORD gives freedom to the prisoners.

What a good day...

…for an attitude adjustment!

I believe in order to have full victory in my life over pesky obsessions and addictions, I need to have the right attitude about myself.   Until I know who I am, I am unable to develop a healthy mental outlook, which is important when one is working toward freedom.  Getting a better understanding of Body/Soul/Spirit gives us a better understanding of who we are in Christ. 

The shape of my body shouldn’t define me, but I let it.   My soul (my emotions and personality) suffers because I let the body rule.   Finding out where/how Christ lives in me (my Spirit) is the key to overcoming self-deprecating thoughts.

Under Construction

Under Construction...

Check back SOON!

Believing in Freedom...

I believe in Freedom.  To go further...well beyond the point that people will agree with me:  I believe that we can be set free without our having to put effort into it.   Completely free.   Why?  Because IF we could have done this, we would have already.  Just look around at how many people are struggling…who have struggled their whole adult lives.  (Some have struggled since childhood!)   These same people, who, for the last year, have been in hands-on combat with the obsession of food, and have gained; or put in all that hard work and have only a minimal loss when it’s all said and done.

The few successful ones have traded one obsession for another:  instead of obsessing about each morsel they put into their mouth and each pound they gain, they are obsessing about each morsel they put into their mouth and each pound they lose.

That’s not freedom in my book!   Can I get an “Amen?”

We can’t wrap our minds around the fact that Freedom is just that…being free.   Having to manage food every day…having to struggle (even if you are on the winning side of the fight temporarily) the fight every day…to “deal with this for the rest of my life” is NOT Freedom.   Never giving thought to my weight, or my food plan, or obsessing about the what/when/how of diets and poundage…that, my Friend, is freedom.

I think, for those of us who are ready to take on the challenge of trusting God, He's got something very precious in store for us:  His easy yoke to replace these chains of bondage under which we live. 

I believe the key is complete trust.   To admit that there is nothing at all I can do to change myself, my core nature, and depend fully on Him to change me.   Goes against the grain of our “I have to” thinking, doesn’t it?

I have to try.

I have to plan.

I have to watch what I eat.

I have to count calories.

I have to be accountable for myself.

I have to try harder.

I have to plan harder.

I have to watch what I eat more carefully.

I have to be more accountable…

That’s never worked long term for me.  Has it for you?  And I believe I’ve struggled just as hard as anybody else, if not harder than some. 

What about, your intellect may want to ask, Proverbs 29:18:  "Where there is no vision, the people perish."   My vision, my plan, is to TRUST HIM.   The NKJV puts it this way:  Where there is no revelation, the people cast off restraint.  I think the revelation is that Jesus already paid the price for my freedom, so why am I struggling so hard for something I can't achieve?

Ever heard the expression, "Letting go and letting Him?"  After all my praying for freedom, all I do is hang on with all my might to my “I have to” mentality and never fully trust my Lord to do the very thing I’ve asked Him to do:  Free me. 

If God can set the alcoholic and drug addicts free WITHOUT a 12 step program, if He can change Paul's heart (as he was on his way to imprison and torture Christians), if he can change the vilest sinner's heart, he can surely change me…WITHOUT a diet plan that I have to manage and struggle with!   Instead of working on my diet plan, I’m going to start working on my trust issues.  

There is Nothing New Under the Sun

If you ever wonder why I don’t update this blog more, it’s just a case of “What else can I say?”   I still binge, I still hate it, and I still obsess.   Nothing new to report.

I started Monday out pretty well…ended it not as well as I would have liked, but the day came to a close on a non-bingeworthy note.   I did a lot of praying, and it obviously helped.   By Wednesday, I didn’t even want to pray, I just wanted to eat.   It’s insanity.   Utter insanity.

In my heart of hearts, I still believe in freedom.   Freedom for me, freedom for the drug addict, the alcoholic, freedom for God’s children living in chains.   Freedom for people living in the pit.   In the pit, in chains.  I believe.   And even though it sounds insane, that belief is NOT insanity.   J

I don’t have the heart to address Part 2 of “How I Got Here” right now.   It’s a little uncomfortable to go back in time…and it’s very, very uncomfortable to figure out the here and now...the whys of what I do to myself.    After I wrote all of Part 1 and the clarification entry, I felt that I had exploited myself for putting it out there.   Maybe “exploited” isn’t the right word.   Maybe it is.  

I don’t like where I am right now.  I don’t like at all that it’s mid-April and I am in the same exact spot I’ve been in for years upon years:   Chained up in the pit.

Obsession.

It’s a mood killer.

However, I can’t change the past.   I must make the decision to learn from it.   I can only live today, I can’t live yesteryear over, and I must make the decision to make today all that I can make it.  I can choose to use it to better my future, or I can choose to continue on the path of self-destruction.

Somehow, I don’t want to be responsible making a choice today.      But I am responsible, and until I am free from this cumbersome burden of obsession, only I can make the choice to give in to a binge, or say “No” until I believe it myself.

It’s a stormy day in Alabama.

It matches my mood.

Update

I am aware that with a Part 1 and a Part 1-A, there surely must be at least a Part 2.    And I do have a part 2, maybe even a part 3....but not today.   Heheh

Today, I am recovering.   I have a really good start on my diet...April Fool's day is a good day to start...only I started Wednesday night, when I got sick!   Really sick.   Over the past 36 hours, I have had two saltines and a little water. 

It's been really fun...in an excruciatingly painful way.

I am definitely on the mend.  

Standing Up to the Plate

I take a break from my non-posting in this blog to….blog!

I’ve been off work this week.   It should have been a more positive experience than it has been, but because I let food (or my desire for it) dictate how I feel, it’s been a little on the lonely side.    Even though it has been days that the Lord made, they have been a little gray and overcast, and my mood became the same way. 

Eating didn’t help…it made things worse.   Shopping didn’t help…I don’t normally spend money I don’t have, so I didn’t buy anything.   Calling a friend didn’t help…not everyone is off this week.   

So, I prayed.   

I had a good long conversation with God, and He reminded me that I’m a princess, a daughter of the Most High God, and not a slave imprisoned by the cares of this world.    I was feeling pretty misplaced…not lost, but misplaced…and as I left my prayer closet, I was feeling a little better.

I went to see my mother, who’s been feeling rather poorly these last few days, and I shared with her my confusion, disappointment, and feelings of defeat over my food obsession.  (That’s a nice way to treat my ailing mother, isn’t it?)   She talked to me about independence…that is, not living my life with a dependency on my urges to eat, but to live independent of those desires of the flesh, and to live in dependency on God.    She also reminded me that I do have a choice, sympathized with me that I felt my problems were much deeper than just a choice, and reminded me again that I need to practice self-control.  

She then said something else profound…we really don’t have much more time to get the word out to a dying and lost world.   There is freedom.   God said so, that settles it.    She told me that as long as I was living under bondage like I am, how would I be going about the Father’s business?   He has a work for me to do, but I’m so wrapped up in my obsession, that I only....obsess.

As I was leaving, she said,

“It’s time for you to stand up to the plate!”  

And she didn’t just mean for me to get ready to bat the ball out of the ballpark.   It’s time for me to stand up to the plate and say, “No!” every now and again.   Exhibit some self-control.  Gain some independence.   Be about my Father’s business. 

Thanks, Mom.

How Did I Get Here Part 1-A: Clarification

My first year experience with school was a nightmare.    My teacher was never nice to me, and I truly do not know if it was because I was tall and skinny with cat-eyed glasses, or if I was bratty.   If she treated anyone else as badly, I never noticed it.   Things she did to me included: 

When I wrote my spelling words backwards on a test, instead of explaining to me what I had done, she sent me to the principal’s office, who also didn’t try to help me.   He told me that if I did that again, I was going to get a paddling.   I don’t know of any six year old little girls who wouldn’t be very afraid.  She also gave me a 0 on the test, with no suggestion of being able to make it up.  (To complete this story, my teacher then told her co-workers about it, one of whom knew my mom, and that lady told Mom what had happened.   They thought it was funny, that I had written my words backwards.   They didn’t know that I had been terrorized about it.   Mom asked me about it later than night, and I lied because I was afraid about this “bad, bad” thing I had done.  Lying was my mom’s biggest no-no.   To top off my lovely day, I got a spanking for lying.)

When my table-mate (and I still remember her name) dropped her pencil and broke the lead, for some reason, she told the teacher that I dropped it.   I had no idea what was transpiring.  I was doing what I was supposed to be doing.   She came up behind me, and before I knew she was there, she yanked me up by my arm and paddled me in front of everyone.  I had no clue why, until she was finished, and she told me that would "teach me to break pencil leads."   Seriously.   Even if I had broken the pencil lead, it only needed to be sharpened.    As I was typing this, my heart was grieved for the little girl that I was.

When a boy threw up near my seat, she wouldn’t let me get up and move.   As I was gagging, and she made me sit there.   Yeah, too gross to read, yes?

I didn’t tell my parents what was going on at school because if I got in trouble at school, I got in trouble at home.   I do not believe my parents would have stood for what was going on, but how does a six year old know that?

The name calling was from my brothers.    Typical big brother bully stuff.   

The unpleasant meals were because I was such a picky child, but I was still expected to eat what was put before me.   That’s the way things used to be.   My parents were raised by parents living in the Great Depression.   You didn’t waste food.   I understand that now, I didn’t then.

Any or all of the above may or may not have contributed to my feelings of inadequacy.   In my earliest years, I don’t believe I had reached “self-loathing” yet.    I had just accepted the fact that I was liked less than others, for whatever reasons.   I remember asking my sister when we were small children, very matter-of-factly, why our grandparents didn’t like us as much as they did the other grandchildren.    I remember her being a little surprised, because she had never felt that way, and she told me they didn’t love us any less.  I didn’t believe her, and it’s a feeling I carried into adulthood.

When I was younger, I felt unloveable because of something I couldn’t change:   The way I looked.    I was bigger than the other children, both in height and weight.  I’m sure it affected the way I acted.

As I grew, the feelings grew.   When other kids starting catching up to me size-wise, the feelings of inadequacy persisted.   By that time, a food obsession was in full force, and my self-loathing was in part due to a fluctuating size I didn’t want to be, and the obsession I seemingly couldn’t control.    By the time I reached 12 or 13, possibly younger, I had a chip on my shoulder.   I wore the chip in the form of rebellion and made lots of wrong and bad choices that only added to my feelings of worthlessness.    

At this point in my story, it is important to again stress that I am not as pitiful as all this sounds.   I have a great family, and I am blessed beyond words.  

How Did I Get Here? Part 1

Disclaimer (of sorts):   If you are not one to like long, detailed, TMI type entries, you may want to skip my next few.  I’m working out a few issues, living out loud, sharing too much…sorting out my thoughts.      

I’ve had weight/food issues for as long as I can remember.   I must have known something wasn’t right…not normal…with me, even as a small child.    These issues didn’t just stop with food or weight, obsession took over and became part of my personality, like a bitter root, choking out the person I should have been.  Before I was in the first grade, I had accepted the thought that I wasn’t liked by others…perhaps it was because of adolescent name-calling, an abusive first-grade teacher, unpleasant meal times…whatever the reason, the battle for my happiness, my success, my very soul, was raging even then. 

In elementary school, I struggled with both food obsession and with liking myself.  If I didn’t like me, I felt I could rest assured that no one else did either.   Even then, I felt inferior, worthless, unliked, and alone.  By the time I was in the sixth grade, I was a little pudgy and that added greatly to my pain, and just strengthened my belief that I was inferior.  In the eighth grade, I dropped a little weight, but my mind still could not separate the feelings of obsession inside with how I looked on the outside.   More significant than that:  my mind couldn’t grasp that my weight didn’t define me.   I wasn’t fat.   But I wasn’t skinny, meaning I wasn’t as thin as some of the other girls; plus, I was taller than most, and because of that, I felt so conspicuous.   Bigger = bad.   This is an issue I struggle with to this day.  

When I was 15, my body wasn’t fat.   My mind was!  Not that I had a fat head, mind you, it’s just that my thinking was completely twisted.   Twisted thinking will make you believe odd things, and start to obsess.   Obsession will lie to you and make you think you can’t change. 

 

This is a picture of me when I was 15.

I only post these pictures to show that I looked normal.

The battle was internal.  (Sorry about the quality.)

And…there are people in this world who do not like me (or someone like me), and choose to never get to know me, because of my weight.   That’s their problem.   Right now, I’m talking about ME!   However, stating the fact that there are folks who don’t like me because of how I look makes me also admit that I do not pursue relationships…fear of rejection, perhaps.   Most likely, though, it’s because of my own issues I have about myself.   I am not a person who needs a lot of friends, though, and I am not as pitiful as I am sounding in this historical entry.

When I graduated from High School, I still wasn’t fat.   I was bigger than I wanted to be; therefore, again, I couldn’t separate (in my own mind) how I looked from who I actually was.   God had a different plan for my life, but obsession made me feel so inferior that I looked for other ways to mask the pain of not liking myself.   The life I chose was a lot more heartbreaking than it had to have been.

Senior Picture

By the time I was in my mid 20’s, I was gaining and losing 30-50 pounds semi-regularly, only I never quite lost everything that I regained, and in the midst of my yo-yoing, I was growing.   The more I grew, the further into the pit I slid.   The pit has a name:  Hopeless, Despair and Discouragement.   It’s a place I’ve called home most of my adult life.

28 years old...

Deeply entrenched in the throes of self loathing.

No Survivor am I

This morning, I really felt like giving up.    “Giving up” doesn’t just include eating all day, every day.   It means not going anywhere…avoiding folks…backing out of going to a double family reunion in Gatlinburg.    I’m already in the pit, I wanted to slide wayyyy back in the lowest crevice and hole up in hopelessness, discouragement and despair for good.

Instead, I called Mom and she prayed for me.   I prayed for myself.  

I read David’s words:   I would have lost heart, unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the lord in the land of the living.   Wait on the LORD, be of good courage, and he will strengthen your heart; wait, I say, on the Lord.   (Ps 27)

And

I waited patiently for the LORD, and He inclined to me, and heard my cry.   He also brought me up out of a horrible pit, out of the miry clay, and set my feet upon a rock, and established my steps.    Be pleased, O LORD to deliver me, make haste to help me.    (Ps 40)

I reread a poem I wrote in 2009:

No Survivor Am I

My worth isn’t measured by my current condition,

Opinions of others, or my present position.

Though my foot may slip, I am not incomplete,

My failures are never my final defeat.

By God’s grace, I’ll dance though the fire,

Knowing by faith I’ll not drown in the mire.

A survivor is never what I shall be

But a powerful overcomer for others to see.

My suffering, I’ll know, was never in vain,

Seeing someone’s miracle brought out of my pain.

My destiny isn’t sealed by today’s situation,

For my current position is not my final destination.

So, instead of giving up, I’m joining Loretta’s club.

I can do this.

...I am poor and needy; yet the Lord thinks upon me.   You are my help and my deliverer; do not delay, O my God.    Ps 40:17


I really like the 40th Psalm.    I like to be reminded that He thinks about me.   Me.   Me?   Yeah, me.   You, too.


He also brought me up out of a horrible pit, out of the miry clay, and set my feet upon a rock, and established my steps.   (vs 2)


Ah, yes!    I just love knowing He is my deliverer and He takes my hand and lifts me from the horrible pit of self loathing and gluttony, and not only puts me on solid ground away from sinking sand, but he also sets up my path in a firm and permanent fashion.  


Trust...I simply must learn to trust Him. 


Oh, taste and see that the LORD is good; blessed is the man (or blessed am I) who trusts in Him!   Ps 34:8


It is better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in man (or myself).   Ps 118:8


Just one more:


PS 143:8  Cause me to hear Your lovingkindness in the morning, for in You do I trust; cause me to know the way in which I should walk, for I lift up my soul to You.

Monday, Stormy Monday....

This morning, I had a moment of panic when I realized that, yet again, I was beginning the day with food obsession.

It’s almost laughable that it’s another Monday, and it’s another start day for me.   Starting what, I am not sure, but I know that I will not continue on the same path.   There’s no more Valentines or birthdays, so February 28 is a good day to get started.

On the way to work, in the midst of my obsessing, I talked to God about it.    All the way to work.   And I passed Jack’s and two McDonalds and didn’t stop…that’s a good start.    

I could be distressed and depressed that I’m no closer to where I want to be than January 1, but I choose to remember that I do have people who love me, no matter what size I am.   I couldn’t always conjure that thought up, but today, I know that people do like me.    It’s amazing, in a sad kind of way, the many years I spent convinced that no one liked me simply because of the way I looked…and some of those years I wasn’t even fat.   I still fight that feeling at times, but I have to face the fact that it’s probably more truth in the fact that I still don’t like myself much of the time.

I should clarify…I don’t like the way I am.  I don’t like my weaknesses.   My constant giving in to temptation without so much as an attempt to fight.   I’m ashamed of the way I look, so I avoid a lot of events that I probably would have enjoyed.  

But today, I’m not going to dwell on the negatives of my situation.   The positive is that I will not binge today.   I will find something else to think about when the obsession starts.   Taking thoughts captive…

2 Corinthians 10:5 “Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ;”

Proverbs 23:7 “For as he thinks in his heart, so is he:”

Today.

That’s all I have to deal with right now.

Yo-Yos and Rollercoasters

I’d like to report how well I’ve been doing with my diet,

but I’m not inclined to lie.

With me, it’s always something…. Thanksgiving, Christmas, Valentine’s Day, my birthday…whatever….and any excuse will do!

After too many “gastronomical delights” in Nashville this past weekend, I am, I’m sure, back where I started the year.    It’s not like this is an unfamiliar place, so I will start.  Again.     Getting started is just as hard as keeping it going, I believe.    There’s just got to be a better way.

The Yo-Yo Rollercoaster.

Welcome to my Amusement Park….

Only I’m not really all that amused.

Confused is more like it.   Why is it that some folks are normal, and then there are folks like me?   I guess the “normal” ones have their own issues, yes?   We all do.   Mine happens to be an obsession with food, and it does tend to show more than an issue with…say…spending money or hoarding, or stalking an ex-lover.   Not that I’m saying any of you, dear gentle readers, have any of the above problems…if you do, start a blog about it…I do like train wrecks, since I am one myself. 

Ah, But Honesty Can Paint a Pretty Picture...

I'm definitely feeling better.

Church last night was exactly what I needed to hear.

It was all about

Repentance

Change

Discipleship

Then I had a dream last night.   I was saying "no," making sure the subject of my dream understood I meant “No!”   And I was tying my walking shoes in preparation for a journey.

I believe some dreams have significance,

and I believe this one did.

I know there are plenty of folks who will not agree with what I am saying.   Some of these people are having great success in the weight loss battle.   However, I see a lot more struggle than I do success EVERYwhere I look.   I believe what the Bible says, and it tells me that He (God) executes justice for the oppressed and freedom for the prisoner.   Further, the Bible says that His yoke is easy, and His burden light.     *IF* I could have done this, I would have already succeeded.   

I believe in Truth.

I believe in Freedom.

True Freedom.

Free indeed.

The Best Is Yet To Come!